


Step by Step

by Star_Trashinum



Series: Trans Riko and Genderfluid Yo [4]
Category: Love Live! School Idol Project, Love Live! Sunshine!!
Genre: Fluff, Other, Riko goes through Testosterone replacement therapy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-26
Updated: 2017-05-26
Packaged: 2018-11-05 02:28:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11004090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Star_Trashinum/pseuds/Star_Trashinum
Summary: Riko starts a vlog of himself to document himself as he goes through testosterone therapy.Takes place a year or so after Riko comes out to Aqours as trans.





	Step by Step

**Author's Note:**

> (Italics indicate a voice crack; for comedic effect :D)

**Log #1 - December 30**

First Day of T

 

 

           Riko adjusted the camera, centering it on the small tripod before backing up to face the lens, smiling as Yo walked behind him in the background.

 

           “S-So… hi, future me… I guess; this is my first vlog of me taking testosterone injections,” Riko began, fiddling with his hands in nervousness, “Yo kept bugging me that she wanted me to start them, but I was always nervous to start ‘cause of the costs and the complications; but she kept pestering me to, ‘cause she wanted me to be the guy she knew I was.”

 

           Riko smiled at the camera, trying to start a sentence before Yo jumped and hugged Riko from behind, making him yelp in surprise.

 

           “Hi future Riko, I bet you’re watching this and you have a cool beard and you look all manly!” Yo yelled, waving incessantly to the camera, “I told Riko that he should tape himself going through the treatment ‘cause we wanted to see how much he would grow through the years.” Yo kissed Riko’s cheek before leaning forward towards the camera, whispering into the microphone, “Hey, to future Yo if you’re listening, tell me how hot Riko gets, and give him a big smooch for me, will ya?”

 

           Riko laughed as he listened in on his girlfriend’s conversation, pretending to make a mad look as he stared at his girlfriend, “Babe, I can’t believe you're cheating on me with my future self, how dare you!” Riko attempted to keep his facade up before laughing, wrapping his arms around her as they shared a short but tender moment.

 

           “I know it’ll be hard; and it’ll suck at some moments, but if you’re watching this, Future Me, I hope it’s all worth it to see the smile on your face that you must have.” Riko gave one last smile to the camera before waving goodbye, Yo following suit.

 

-CLICK-

 

**Log #5 - February 3**

First month since starting T

 

           “Hi future me!!! It’s been about a month since I’ve started my injections, and i can already see a difference!” Riko cheered, bringing one of his arms up as he flexed for the screen, “I’ve been going to the gym with baby and Kanan, and my shoulders feel wider and everything!” Riko excitedly showed himself off to the camera, flexing in different ways until he noticed Yo snickering in the background, watching him from a distance. “Hey, are you making fun of me baby?” Riko jokingly shouted, putting up his arms, “I’ll totally fight you now, I can beat you up, I swear.”

 

           “I’m more than sure you can, darling,” Yo giggled, feeling up Riko’s arms, “you’re the coolest and strongest and no one can ever beat you.” Yo laughed a bit harder as Riko puffed his chest out and flexed one more time, before dropping the act altogether and throwing his arms around Yo.

 

           “So yeah; besides that; nothing is too different, except for that fact that I’ve become a super pizza now,” Riko started, showing his face, which now had small patches of acne, “I know this was supposed to happen, but it’s dumb regardless; I wanna fight my face off.” Riko pushed his face close to the screen, showing the acne to the camera. Riko moved away from the camera, going to wash his face for the umpteeth time that day, leaving Yo to sneak up to the camera.

 

           “Oh, I remember something cute that happened,” Yo began, pushing herself closer to the screen, “a few days ago, Riko ran into our study while I was working on papers and put his foot on the table and screamed ‘LOOK AT HOW MUCH HAIR I HAVE NOW BABE’ and tried to then turn around to show me all of his back ha-” Riko quickly shoved a hand to Yo’s mouth, stopping her from continuing the story, while also trying his hardest to turn off the recording.

 

           “Hahahaha so yeah definitely nothing happened yup noth- OW YO DON’T BITE MY HAND,” Riko struggled, yelping as Yo bit his hand in retaliation, “so yeah see ya I swear don’t listen to Yo’s story it wasn’t real I swear-”

 

-CLICK-

 

**Log #9 - March 3**

Two months since starting T

 

           The camera screen flickered on, struggling to focus, before showing a tired Riko, complete with messy short hair, and the tiniest beginnings of a moustache. He rubbed his eyes, trudging towards the kitchenette before placing the camera on the table, cracking two eggs onto a pan. “Hiiii future me… I’m sleepy as heck but Yo is having a rough ‘shark week’, and she literally kicked me out of bed ‘cause she’s in a lot of pain; so I’m making breakfast so she’ll calm down,” Riko tiredly mumbled, with only the sound of oil popping before a loud scream erupted from a different room, “aaaaand that’s her again; on the other hand, I haven’t had my period in almost three months now, which is probably because of me being on T and all that.”

 

           “I HATE YOU WHY DON’T YOU HAVE PERIODS ANY MORE WHAT THE FUCK WHY WON’T YOU SUFFER WITH ME ANYMORE YOU BETRAYED ME!” Yo shouted from the other room, leaving Riko in a fit of giggles as he moved the two eggs onto plates, before laying down strips of bacon on the pan.

 

           “But besides that, I haven’t had any noticeable side effects; the doctor gave me this paper with everything that usually happens with treatments, and besides my acne, I’ve been pretty clear,” Riko pointed out, showing to the camera the list, before putting the bacon onto a paper towel, patting them down before turning everything off. Riko set two pieces of bread into the toaster before Yo walked into the shot, covered in a red blanket, slumping on Riko’s shoulder.

 

           “Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah baby I feel like everything is beating me up at the same time,” Yo groaned, sitting down on a chair. Riko rubbed Yo’s back before she face planted onto the table, letting out a soft scream as Riko placed the two plates onto the counter.

 

           “Well I’ll be heading off now, there hasn’t been many big changes, but every bit counts, y’know? ” Riko beamed, turning off the camera as Yo weakly waved goodbye, “see you later future me!”

 

-CLICK-

 

**Log #10 - March 10**

 

           The camera quickly opened up, blurrily moving back and forth as Yo ran to the bathroom, attempting to hold the camera steady and hide her laughter as she heard Riko throwing up in the bathroom. “Honey… are you OK in there?” Yo called out, hearing Riko stop for a second, then continue right after, “what’s wrong?”

 

           “UHHHHHHH I DON’T KNOW WHAT’S WRONG I’VE BEEN FINE UP UNTIL NOW AND NOW MY BODY HATES ME I SWEA-” Riko screamed from the other side of the bathroom door before throwing up again, sobbing as he finally stopped, “it’s been like… 3 bajillion years I DON'T DESERVE THIS BABE I’M A GOOD PERSON” Yo attempted to open the door to help Riko up and to a more comfortable position, but he had locked himself in and was apparently listening to Fall Out Boy on his phone speakers.

 

           “I know, I know, nobody said it was your fault baby,” Yo calmly started as she tried not to irritate her already suffering boyfriend, “do you want me to get you anything for when your tummy is better?”

 

           “I want like… 30 donuts… the ones that are made with chocolate and they’re dipped in chocolate please,” Riko finally responded, before beginning to cry again, “why body I’m gonna fight you I swear to God ahhhhhhh”

 

           “Okay baby, I’ll be back soon,” Yo called out, before bending down to whisper to the camera, “future Riko, please tell me that these side effects stop soon; I love Riko more than anything, but one can only listen to so much Fall Out Boy before they go crazy too.”

 

           “I-Isn’t it messed up… how I’m just …. D-dying to beeee himmmmmm… I”M JUST A NOTCH IN YOUR BED POOOOOST BUT YOUR JUST -ughhhh- LINE IN…. a song…”

 

-CLICK-

 

**Log #19 - May 12**

4 months since starting T

 

 

           Riko waved to the camera, watching Yo in the background, looking over the stove as she cooked lunch. Riko exuberantly jumped towards the camera, face brimming with excitement. “Older me, guess what!?!” Riko exclaimed, voice noticeably different that usual, “My voice is finally starting to drop; I’m starting to sound like a real guy now!”

 

           “You do sound more like a guy, that is true,” Yo started, calling out as she scooped rice into two small bowls, “but you're still at, like, the voice of a 13-year old right now!” Riko puffed his cheeks our and jokingly scowled at Yo, pretending to look angry at his girlfriend for not seeing his progress, even if he knew that she was just teasing him a bit.

 

           “No, I swear I _sound_ cool,” Riko attempted to yell back, only to have his voice crack, which sent Yo sprawling to the floor in laughter, “hey; you’re being really rude right now!” Yo rolled over and got up, barely able to contain his laughter as she got back to finishing her cooking. “I’m sorry you have to deal with this sassmaster, Future Riko, but I hope she’s not a meanie face as well,” Riko berated, chuckling after his joking comment, “but seriously, I’m just so happy at how far I’ve come already, and how much I’ve changed.” Riko smiled brightly at the screen, before getting up, running towards Yo to hug her waist, coming close to whisper something into her ear, before sharing a tender kiss. “Thank you so much for pushing me to do this and sticking with me through it all,” Riko told Yo, slightly tearing up with the overflow of emotions,” I wouldn’t be here and this happy if it wasn’t for you.

 

           “Babe, you’re being all mushy and emotional again; you’re gonna make me cry too,” Yo responded, wiping tears away from Riko’s eyes, “and yes, I couldn’t be happier to see how much you’ve changed and how happy you are; you happy is me happy.” The two embraced each other, Yo rubbing the small of Riko’s back as he buried his head into Yo’s shoulder, staying there for a while until Riko realized he had left the camera on, breaking away from the hug with a long kiss.

 

           “Sorry if that was a bit too _mushy_ , future me,” Riko apologized, giving a goofy grin to the camera, “although, with Yo the way she is, I bet that still happens regardless.” Yo gave a bright smile to the camera, before setting the pan she was cooking on onto the table, scooping what seemed to be fried rice onto a plate. “Ooh, _gotta go_ future me, lunch is ready,” Riko quickly announced, fiddling with the camera, “I’ll talk to you soon, bye me!”

 

-CLICK-

 

**Log #28 - July 14**

6 months since starting T

 

           “Hey hey, older me, listen to me now!” Riko called to the camera, his voice significantly more deep and smoother sounding than it was, “I’m sounding a lot more masculine; I sound nothing like I used to anymore, even when I sing!” Riko walked over to the piano and flipped through a large book of sheet music, stopping at a particular song, before stretching out his fingers and taking a deep breath.

 

“Kiss; I want to fly to you and take you away, so

I don't need a response, it's useless to argue

Kiss; your indifferent manner's just a lie, isn't it?

I already know there's heat in your eyes”

 

            Riko continued through the song, too focused on playing to realize that Yo was staring intensely at him, blushing intensely as she listened. “What’s wrong baby?” Riko questioned, stopping to look at the red-cheeked Yo, “you’re looking flustered.”

 

            “How could I not!?!” Yo shouted, hiding her face in her hands, “your singing voice is already one of the best I’ve ever heard… and now it’s so deep and smooth and weeeeh...” Yo swooned, clutching her heart in attempt to calm it over how head over heels she was over Riko, before taking a deep breath, walking over to the piano. “Now, would this piano aficionado care to let a novice sing along with him?” Yo asked, scooching onto the other side of the piano, flipping through the piano book, “this song is great; it’d be great to sing together.” Riko began to slowly play the song that Yo chose, before they both began to sing.

 

“Fly me to the moon, let me play among the stars,    
Let me see what spring is like on Jupiter and mars,  
In other words,  hold my hand!    
In other words, baby kiss me!”

            “Still remember that after all this time, Yo?” Riko smiled, kissing his girlfriend’s hand, “you’re still amazing to this day, you haven’t lost a single bit of your talent.”

 

            “You’re flattering me love, really,” Yo cutely responded, leaning over to kiss Riko’s cheek, “you’re the one who’s still practicing music, darling.” The two exchanged kisses for a while, getting more and more heated until Riko was straddled over Yo, making out with her, consciously unaware that they were being filmed the whole time, until Yo looked over and saw the red light of the camera. She attempted to wiggle out from underneath Riko, but his grip was too strong, smothering Yo in kisses and touches until the camera’s battery ran dry.

 

-CLICK- 

 

**Log #52 - December 29**

1 year since starting T

 

            The camera flashed on, focusing on a bathroom mirror, which showed Riko, complete with a full trimmed moustache, and a small patch of chin hair. “It’s been a year since I’ve started T and have done these vlogs, and look at how far I’ve come, future me!” Riko announced, smiling to the camera as he pointed his chin up, showing the hair he was growing, “I’m finally starting to look like a real guy now!” Riko’s eyes blinked, tears forming at the corners as he realized how much time had passed, and just how far he had come. The door suddenly swung open, with a set of arms and brown hair flying across the screen, which was Yo, embracing Riko. “And I never would have done it without you, love,” Riko cooed, returning the loving hugs, “without you here, I wouldn’t be this happy and comfortable, dear.” The two held their hug for a while, before looking back to the mirror, as Riko looked at his reflection, and began to tear up.

 

            “I-Is there something wrong dear?” Yo quickly asked quickly gripping one of his arms.

 

            “I-I just… I realized how much I’ve changed so soon.. a-and how I love the way I look… and you do too… and... and-” Riko explained, before tears welled up and fell, Riko slumping over as he cried, too overcome with emotions, “I just feel so… myself… and you’re here… and I couldn’t be any more happy and safe and so… me.” Yo quickly came to Riko’s aid, holding him in her arms as he cried, mumbling ‘I love you’ in between gasps of air. Riko’s breath finally settled, taking a tissue to blow his nose before looking back at the screen, eyes red and puffy. “This is gonna be my last vlog; nothing too different is really happening, and I figured that this was the last big milestone to hit,” Riko told the camera, smiling as Yo held his hand, “Thank you, Past Riko, for never giving up on getting  here; you never gave up, and without that, none of this could have been possible.” Riko made one last wave to the camera, with Yo following suit, before reaching towards it to turn it off.

 

              “And to future Riko; if ever you feel like you haven’t done anything or achieved much, just look at how far you’ve come.”

 

-CLICK- 

 

**Date - December 28, 2019**

 

            Riko sighed as he set a heavy cardboard box down on the floor; the last of dozens they had taken with them as they moved. It was always in the back of his mind that they would eventually need a change of scenery; a plan that him and Yo had in the works for years. Riko sat down onto the floor, exhausted as he laid against the box, closing his eyes as he took long deep breaths, running his hands through his hair, scrolling through his phone to see if Yo had texted him any updates about the other moving truck. Seeing that his notifications were empty, he stood back up, looking at the pile of boxes he had stacked together, before noticing that one was left wide open. He walked towards the box, opening it up to see an assortment of DVDs and wires, along with a camera bag. He smiled as he remembered the videos he had taken of himself when he had first started treatments; both him and Yo were so excited that they wanted to capture every moment of it. Riko scrolled through the thumbnails, before he couldn’t go back any further, reaching the first one he had ever taken. He pressed play, smiling at how much different his voice sounded compared to how it was; so high, so squeaky, so girly. His grin warmed up considerably as he saw Yo; as happy and cheery as she always was; smile as bright as the sun. Riko continued the rest of the small video, laughing at Yo’s little message, reminding himself to show Yo later. Riko drifted off nostalgically, thinking back to all the small little milestones that he had on the way to getting here; how happy he was over every single one. Riko’s mind refocused to the camera; noticing that the video was almost over. He laughed as he heard him teasing Yo, as they usually did to each other, but suddenly froze as he heard his past self speak the last line.

 

“I know it’ll be hard; and it’ll suck at some moments, but if you’re watching this, Future Me, I hope it’s all worth it to see the smile on your face that you must have.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading this!  
> This was a very important and meaningful story to write; it may be flawed and short, but I hope I was able to share the sentiment behind it.  
> Again, thank you so much.


End file.
